“It’s Not Your Job to Fix Them!”

It’s been about 7-8 years ago when some very good ministry friends on the west coast contacted us about helping a young man. They described his dilemma, which was totally off the charts, for me. Our friends asked us to pray about allowing him to come to Sayre for a period of time in an effort to help him overcome his addiction. We’ve done this kind of thing fairly often over the past 20+ years with a pretty impressive track record. I say that with all humility. And I’d admit that even though we had a good measure of success, when the Lord is involved….we have very little to do with the results.

We’re often asked….“What kind of program do you have?” Our answer is always, “We don’t have a program”. Not a thing wrong with programs as long as they’re working but we just don’t have a program. I do believe that what we do is pretty important, though. It’s so simple that most people, especially the professionals, would scoff at it…but it just seems to work. We bring those in that the Lord sends our way. We develop a relationship with them, and we consider them part of our family. They do what we do, they go where we go; they’re involved with us in about everything we do. And it’s just pretty amazing the transformation that happens in nearly all of them.

We picked up the young man from the OKC airport and our hearts were immediately joined to his. He was a very likable, personable young man. He opened up and began to talk to Daryle Perry and myself about his problem. He was more deeply involved in sexual activity (50-60 different partners in the previous month!) than I’d ever even heard of before….and he wanted to be free. As he and Daryle talked it began to go through my mind as to ‘how’ we could help him. I’d been involved in ministry a lot but this, well this was way beyond anything I’d ever been exposed to before. I began to agonize over it and I started to worry that we were way in over our heads on this one. Almost as soon as the worry ‘set in’, I heard the ‘still small voice’ of the Lord say, very clearly to my spirit, “It’s not your job to fix him….It’s your job to love him. I’ll do the fixing”! 

That word from the Lord brought some immediate peace to me. So, that’s just what we did….we loved him. He remained here in Oklahoma with us for 6-8 months. He was a hard worker, everyone loved him (literally no one knew what his problems were or why he was here. We stay true to the idea of confidentiality!). The time came when he believed he was free from his addiction and we felt very good about it as well. We were blessed by his time here and became very good friends with him. After he left we stayed in contact with him and still chat occasionally.

I think it’s a very liberating thing for us to all understand (especially ministry people!) that it’s not our job to ‘fix them’…..but it is our job to love them! It really makes all the difference!

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Do You Have Enough Faith?

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God Is My Co-Pilot! ……and therein lies the problem!

I started seeing that bumper-sticker when I was a kid, and I still see it every now and then….and it still makes me laugh. Oh, I get what they were trying to say and at a distance it sounds like a totally sensible and wholesome thing to do. I can relate to the whole “Co-Pilot” thing a little bit. In fact there was probably a time in my own life that I thought, Him being my co-pilot would be a very legitimate, and smart thing to do. I mean, if you haven’t had Him along at all….putting Him in the passenger seat would definitely be better than nothing at all. But when you think about it, it really doesn’t make much sense at all. In fact,….and especially if you’re thinking long-term, if He’s your Co-Pilot….it might just explain why things aren’t going so well!

I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say…..If you actually created the  Universe…by just ‘speaking it into being’, like He did, then you shouldn’t have to sit in the ‘second seat’ for anybody…..anytime! And seriously….right here’s where the problem exists. We think we can bring the Lord along with us, and into the situations and events in our lives and everything should be OK. But in all actuality….He should be the One piloting ‘this thing’ (your life!). You and I are really not qualified to run our own lives….and if we’re smart we’ve already figured that out. And, why would we?? He is the ‘Author and Finisher’ of our faith; He knows the beginning from the end; He’s the Alpha and Omega. And……..He knows so much more about us…and our lives than we do.

So, all I’m saying is, we need to change seats! Let’s let Him get in the Pilot seat where He belongs and let’s, you and I, just scoot on over and be content to ride ‘shotgun’!

If you liked this….you’ll like this one too!

*click on the highlighted link to read

“Go to God First”

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It’s A Different Kind of Love!

Just as strong,…..just as pure, just as perfect…..it’s just different! I’m talking about the love I have for my three daughters-in-law, Kristy, Kelly….and Chelsea! I don’t know how to accurately explain it….I just know it’s different. After I came to the Lord in 1984, and after I learned the incredible value in prayer….I’ve prayed for my kids….even before they were born…..and especially after they were born. One of the things that I prayed specifically for them, even when they were just toddlers, is that the Lord would cause that “one”  special person on the planet that they were to be married to, and spend the rest of their lives with would gravitate toward them at precisely the right time in their lives. I prayed that they would love my boys, be Godly, genuine girls of integrity, beautiful on the inside and out, that they’d have a ‘heart for the Lord”, be great, loving, nurturing mothers….and women of prayer, and be the perfect partner/friends for my boys. (and Cameron too)

When these beautiful girls showed up on the radar screen, the Lord did more than just answer my prayers. He really ‘over-delivered’!  And as high as my expectations were as a dad…..they totally exceeded them. They are all such a fit in our family. In fact….I told the boys when they were dating them that if this didn’t work out….the girls stayed and they’d have to leave! lol

They’re raising some phenomenal kids, (all except Chelsea….who’ll have her first, a daughter, in January! *Can’t hardly wait!) handsome, pretty, smart….and teaching them all the right things as well as instilling in them, genuine character….something that you don’t find often in this day and time. I’d be fiercely protective of them if the need were to arise and I’d do for them anything that they’d ask of me.

They’re, all three, amazing ‘gifts’ from the Lord to our family.…and I love them with an incredible, almost indescribable love. It’s a different kind of love.

*Incidentally, Kelly….just two days ago (11/22/2015) had her third baby….our 8th Grandbaby!! A little boy, Knox River Taylor!

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These are “Our Girls”, Kelly (Cole), Chelsea (Clay), Cameron (Our Daughter), Kristy (Clint)

 

 

 

 

I’ve Never ‘Led’ Anyone to the Lord……and I Ain’t Planning on Doing it Anytime Soon!

And to be even more specific about it….I’m never going to, either! In fact I think it’s ‘flawed’ terminology….I mean, really flawed! Now, keep in mind I didn’t grow up in church but I had a handful of people down through the years try to ‘lead’ me to the Lord. Their methods were, 1)  to scare me with hell by convincing me how bad I was, and that I was going there…. or 2) Give me that speech, “Now if Jesus came tonight….” You’re probably familiar with both of those methods, and you’ve probably heard them both a few times yourself. I guess it comes from someone, somewhere telling them that they needed to get out there and start winning souls….and maybe, just maybe in their warped sense of religious thinking the ‘end’ would, somehow, justify any means to get to the bottom line! And the ‘bottom line’ is to get us to pray that prayer; you know, the Sinner’s Prayer. *(not in the Bible, by the way!) And it always left me thinking, that for me to pray that prayer,….was more for them…..than for me. So they could go tell their friends who ‘they’ led to the Lord and then carve another ‘notch’ in their Bible. Oh, yeah, and those ones who wanted to lead me to the Lord, ……it was those guys that kept me away from the church (it’s a bad excuse) for years! Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t want to go to hell but I really didn’t want to be in a church that made people feel like they made me feel, either!

Jesus didn’t do it that way! Everywhere He went sinners and tax collectors followed. There was something in the ‘atmosphere’ that made them feel ‘valued’! It was agape! …..that unconditional, unadulterated, unfiltered, raw kind of love…of which there is no comparison! 

“No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him” – Jesus

So, nope, I’ve never led anyone to the Lord….but I have got to see a bunch of ’em when He ‘led’ ’em by!

 

 

“God, If You’re Out There, You Gotta Help Me!”

That’s the most profound prayer I ever prayed. It’s not very professional sounding but I hadn’t had much practice when I prayed it! It was exactly 31 years ago today when I sat on the edge of my bed out on the ranch in the Texas Panhandle. I came home from a trip to Oklahoma City with a close friend. I dropped him off an hour from my house and headed home. I don’t know any other way to describe the 60 miles from there to home except to say that I was weeping (I don’t even use that word) uncontrollably. My marriage was over and I had about every problem that you could imagine. I got to my house, out there in the middle of nowhere, went in the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror….and hated everything about me. I saw myself turning into something that I knew better than. And I went in my bedroom, sat on the end of my bed…..still weeping, with no hope….. and said, “God, if you’re out there….You’ve gotta help me!” 

I have a great family….always supportive. And, I’ve always had a lot of good friends, I mean really good friends, ones you could ‘count on’.…but I was in a place in my life where no one could really help me but the Lord. At the time I thought it was the worst time in my life….but looking back it turned out to be the best…..even though I didn’t know it at the time. 

I knew nothing about trusting God; I knew nothing about walking by faith but I was in such a messed up place in my life that, out of desperation, I, just kind of blindly, put my trust in the Lord. It was the right thing to do!

One of my problems was over with overnight; it was supernatural, miraculous, really!  ……the rest of my problems were not over with overnight! I’m grateful to the Lord for fixing that one thing….but I’m more grateful to Him for ‘not’ fixing all the others that way. I’m afraid if He would have….it would’ve been like it had been the previous ten years. I’d run to Him when I was in a jam in my life…and when that set of circumstances was over…I was back to ‘my own way’.…never having any kind of real relationship with the Lord.

He had no good reason to rescue me….but He did! It’s a longer story. I’ll tell the rest of it somewhere along the way but the most important thing is that…..whatever’s going on with you….He has the answer and He’ll help you now. 

Maybe all you can say is, “Help”! Turns out, that’s enough! He’ll hear….and He’ll help! That….I’m sure of!

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A “Disposable” Relationship

 

It Was A “Test” of Epic Proportions!

Well that might be exaggerating just a little bit….but at the time, ……and considering my ‘new’ standing in the Lord, it really was quite the test. It was in 1985 and my good friend, Danny Mason, invited me to judge his annual bull riding in Mineral Wells, Texas. It was a big event; lots of money up, and some of the best riders in the world were competing there. The crowd was huge. I’m standing inside the arena and Cade, my 2nd son who was about 3 at the time, was sitting in a box seat where I could do my judging job and also keep a close eye on him.

The first section of about 12 riders was completed, there was a 10 minute break and we were about to start the second section.About that time I hear a loud voice coming from the grandstands griping and cussing about the judging. Well , immediately, I assumed that it’s someone that I know just kidding, and giving me a hard time. But I finally saw the guy coming up the walkway to where I was…..and I’d never seen this guy before! He swiftly walked my way and into the box seat section where Cade was sitting…..still yelling and cussing at me. By now he’d drawn the attention of everyone at the event. If not for his yelling voice, you could’ve heard a pin drop….and every eye in the place is on us!

I said to him, “If you want to talk to me, you need to get down here and talk to me!” But he just kept on! Now, I’ve never considered myself a ‘fighter’ but I’ve also always had a resolve to not let anyone push me around, either. In professional rodeo in those days I had to ‘stand my ground’ many a time. And what made this situation even more difficult was the fact that my life had, just less than a year before, been turned around…..and I was growing in my relationship with the Lord. So I knew, to handle things how we used to handle them,….would not be the ‘right’ thing to do.

Still yelling and cussing at me, I told him again, “If you want to talk to me, you get down here and talk to me!” He’s by now leaning over the top rail on the fence and I somehow resisted the opportunity to knock him plumb out, like I would’ve done only a few years before. And without thinking….I grabbed the hat off his head and just whipped him over the head with it! I then pitched it behind him in front of the grandstand and most of the 300-400 people were laughing uncontrollably…..and all my friends….well, they were laughing harder than that! When I did that, I said to him, “Now, I’ve told you about three times….if you want to talk to me, you need to get down here and talk to me! You got anything to say to me?!” He pressed his lips together….shook his head “No”, picked up his hat (amongst all the laughter) and made his way into the distance!

Now that probably ain’t the best way to handle a situation like that….and I doubt that Jesus would’ve whipped him over the head with his hat…..but considering the alternative….I think I did pass the test!

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*If you like Rodeo Stories, you’ll enjoy these: 

*(click on highlighted link to read)

VIP #1 Booger Bryant

VIP #2 Sarge Cook

VIP #8 Monty Taylor

8378 Zulu…..And the Flight That Was Almost the Last One!

First Trip To Calgary

August 12….A Day That Lives in Infamy…..*at  Least For Me!

Avoid the Vending Machine, Microwave, Green Chile Burritos in the Albuquerque Airport At All Costs!

There’s Grace For That!

I catch myself saying that quite a bit these days. I say it because it’s true. And it doesn’t matter what the situation or circumstances are….it’s always true….without fail. We had one of our young couples recently who miscarried. It’s a devastating event;  A little life so looked forward to and anticipated and planned for, little brothers and sisters who are excited about their new sibling;  Grandparents, aunts, and uncles who’ve already been shopping for the new little one….then all of a sudden…the stunning, paralyzing, news. I hurt deeply for the young couple because I know all too well the pain and heartbreak that just naturally ensues. That grief that comes is not proof that something’s wrong with us…..No!  Much to the contrary…..it’s proof that something’s ‘right’ with us! We’ve been there….done that and somehow lived through it. And the reason we lived…..there’s grace for that!

I just talked to a couple of brothers last night who had just, unexpectedly, lost their dad. He was in the hospital, serious but improving, then all of a sudden….he’s gone. I don’t have anything to compare to it. I just know that it’s one of those things that has the potential to hit the heart in the deepest place. I can’t help but be broken for my friends…..but they’ll be OK. They’ll be OK ’cause there’s grace for that too!

A young guy was in my office today. His wife had just informed him that she doesn’t love him anymore. He’s devastated; he has no answers….and his heart is broken in two. Then there are the kids…what’s going to happen with the kids? How can he explain this nightmare to them? I don’t know…..there’s so much I don’t know these days, but what I do know is….there’s grace for that too! ……and somehow the Father, and the grace that He freely gives will see them all through!

It doesn’t have to be a tragedy for grace to appear; whenever, however…..and for whatever grace is needed for……it’s always there….and there’s always enough of it. The Father knows what you need and He won’t keep you waiting!

Whatever you’re going through right now…..and whatever you need right now…….There’s Grace For That!

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It Ain’t Grace’s Fault!

You Can Live in the Past if You Want To…..But There Is a ‘Downside’

II’s not rare to see people who are living in the past, in fact it’s pretty common by my experience. By ‘living in the past‘ I mean that most of a person’s entire focus is directed on what’s happened before. There are those who live in the regrets and failures of the past…but then there are also those I see from time to time who live in the victories and triumphs of the past. Obviously focusing on victories and triumphs would be a more pleasant thing than focusing on failures…..but either way……..there’s a downside.

I was talking to a friend recently who talked a lot about the ‘bad things’ (his own words) he’d done in the past. He was constantly saying about himself things like….“I don’t deserve for God to bless me”, “I know I’m not good enough”, “I’ve done a lot of bad things”. You don’t have to look far to find those that are hung up on their past. And then on the other hand I often hear those who, for instance, had a successful career in sports and much of their talk is about how good they were. In most cases it was probably true but I’m pretty sure to be focused, even on the glory days, has a downside.

I’ve had my own issues and temptations to ‘live in the past’. And for me it seems mostly centered around mistakes I’ve made and regrets of  not doing things different than I could/should have. It can be a recurring thing for me so I have to discipline myself to ‘not stay’ in the past for very long periods of time or it becomes extremely counter-productive….to say the least.

But the most tragic thing I see of people living in the past is that if your focus is ‘back there‘, so to speak, you are missing out on something today! Our joy and contentment can never be fully experienced if we’re focused on the past. And even more serious is the reality that if you’re missing out on something today….your future is severely impaired.

Most everyone would agree that God has a plan for their life, and for those living in the past…….if something doesn’t happen to cause them to re-focus they’ll surely miss their destiny. We need to learn to live in the ‘now’! It might be profitable to glance back every now and then and learn from our mistakes but we should get our focus back where it needs to be as quick as possible…….and that is on the Lord….and His plan for our lives!

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VIP #9 – Art Harris

I first met Art Harris in October of 1988, our last year on the ranch north of Allison, Texas. I had been taking care of 2500 head of cattle for Art’s cousin from Munday, Texas. Art came down that day that we gathered the cattle. We were busy weighing cattle all that day and I didn’t get to visit a lot with Art ……but enough to know that I liked him a lot. Art had grown up in Seymour, Texas and was one of the best athletes to ever graduate there. He played football and basketball where he was a standout in both sports. He’s still known, admired and idolized around those parts just simply as, Art Lynn.

When we moved across the line into Oklahoma and we needed to find a bank I looked for Art…..and after I found him he would be our banker for the next 27 years. In that time we became very good friends. I’ve said often that Art was the last of the ‘old time’ bankers. That kind of banker that believed in you as a person and loaned money based on that premise. In fact, he actually loaned millions of dollars on exactly that! We bought a several houses (rental properties) over the years and just called Art after the fact. It was never a problem.

By 1997 Art had become a VP and loan officer and was heading up the branch in Sayre. We started Trinity Fellowship in a home and then moved to a small building on the south end of town. When we grew to about 35 people (on a good day) we started looking for another place. We landed on Walter Merrick’s property two miles east of town on I-40. The Merrick family was gracious to allow us to use the property with no rent from ’92 to ’97…..which was a good thing because we had no money

The property became available for purchase and there were some very interested people who had the means to buy it. But we felt that the Lord wanted us to have the property. After a lot of prayer we decided we should try to buy. I remember vividly sitting in Art’s office and telling him that we wanted to buy the property. Art said “Yes”, and the rest is history.

Why do I tell that story?? I tell it because Art Harris believed in us when there wasn’t much to believe in. In two years we had the property (100 acres on I-40) totally paid off. Art started coming to church with us along about that time and our friendship deepened even more.

A couple of years ago Art was diagnosed with cancer. It was a tough diagnosis with the doctors giving him 6 months to live. I was there at his house when he arrived from Oklahoma City after getting the discouraging news. We prayed and he vowed to fight it…which he did. There was a mixture of reports from the docs over the next year, some good …..some not. Three of us went to Dallas in December to watch the Texas state football finals games. Art tired easy and didn’t have a lot of energy but it was a great trip, nonetheless. It was only a few months later that he was promoted to heaven.

When I look back over the years since I’ve known Art it’s very obvious how much he’s helped the Taylor family……and the Trinity family, as well. There’s hundreds of stories out there just like mine….of people that Art believed in. and gave them a ‘leg up’.

He was my Friend! There’s no question about it for me…..Art Harris is definitely a VIP! …….and you wouldn’t have to look far to find a lot of other people who think so too!

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I Hardly Ever Ask the Lord for Patience!

It’s the truth! I’ve learned my lesson and learned it well. Definitely not asking the Lord for patience! And, don’t get me wrong….I do need a good dose of patience. I’m doing so much better than in the past but still have a long ways to go. But years ago, I’d say about thirty to be more specific, I did ask the Lord for patience…….but not anymore!

There was this person who came into my life; a friend, although I didn’t know him well. *(but got to know him very well!) He was going through an extremely rough spot in his life with finances, family, health….and you name it, he had it going on. I wanted to help and did a pretty decent job for a good while. But he was relentless. He’d show up at our place mid-morning and be there all day….and sometimes on into the evening hours….and occasionally way into the night. When he wasn’t there he’d be calling me on the phone. It became apparent that he was putting all his trust in me….and not the Lord. I know better now but in those early days walking with the Lord I didn’t know much of how to point someone to Him. And in my strong desire to help, I often found myself in these kinds of situations.

After months of this, non-stop, daily, almost continual barrage of hearing this person’s problems I was complaining to a close friend. His reply to my whining went pretty much like this, “Well, Andy I remember you praying for patience.” Whoa! The light bulb finally came on in my mind. He was right….months before, and more than once, I had prayed for patience. I needed it….and I was sincere when I prayed!

My experience is that when we pray for patience, God doesn’t just hand it over to us. Nope, much to the contrary; he allows us to be in, and go through, situations where we’ll learn patience. I mean, it’s OJT (On the Job Training) at it’s best. I think, for me, the Lord knew what I’d be doing later (a life of ministry), and how much I would need patience. He never makes any mistakes that way!

I’m still a long ways from perfection where patience is concerned and for most all the years since I first asked for it, I’ve been in some kind of situation where I could learn it to a deeper level. And, to each his own…..but, as for me, I ain’t asking the Lord for patience any more!

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