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Let’s Start an “I Love You” Culture!

I grew up in a household where the “I love you’s” were very common. I didn’t realize how important that was until I was all grown up. As a matter of fact, I don’t guess I really came to the stark realization of just how important that was until I began to encounter person after person who didn’t have the same luxury as me. It has been a bit of an eye-opener of how many people my age never heard their dad say, “I love you.”. From experience, I’d say that moms are traditionally a lot better to say it than dads. But, saying it is important……and more important than you might imagine.

In my part of the world, I’ve been in the Texas Panhandle or Western Oklahoma all my life, it seems to have been part of the culture. Not sure if the same would go for other parts of the USA or the rest of the world for that matter but it wouldn’t surprise me. Fact is there are myriads of people out there who didn’t hear “I love you” in their home, from their parents or their people and as a result, they don’t say it either. It makes an incredible difference to hear it. I can’t number the times I’ve sat in my office with people of all ages with one after the other recanting their heartbreak over wondering if they were loved at all. Of course, in most if not nearly all cases they were loved, ……just not told.

I’m free with the term and I’ve found out that if you tell other people you love ’em in a little bit they’ll return the favor. For many who are not free with it, it may feel very awkward and unnatural at first but as time goes by it’ll start to feel like second-nature. My best example is one of my close friends; he grew up in one of those homes where he was loved but it wasn’t said. He caught the significance of what I’m talking about and started the process with his grown sons. It caught on! Now I’ll walk through our offices and hear him on the phone with one of his boys and they’ll finish the call with, “Love Ya”. It blesses me to hear that! It’s doable and you can do it too!

Now, here’s something serious to think about. If we didn’t hear it from our parents and if we believe we weren’t loved, when we start to connect with God, who is a Father, it’s extremely hard for us to believe that He can love us either. It profoundly affects the most important relationship you’ll ever have! The more you trust the Father, …..the more fulfilling your life will be! ………we need to fix this!

Tell me about your own experience. Is it easy for you or not? What difference have you seen with your people upon being told, “I love you”? Let me hear your stories.

So, here’s my proposition. I’m startin’ an “I love you” culture! It might even turn into a revolution. Wouldn’t that be something?!

Who’s with me?

 

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Born to be Mild

Not a misprint! You were expecting “Born to Be Wild”, right? I still hear that term every now and then. Anyone growing up in the 60s would be familiar with the phrase, remembering the hit song from John Kay, and Steppenwolf. Most people associate the song with the hit movie of the time, Easy Rider. Born to be Wild is sometimes regarded as the first ‘heavy metal’ song.

As we mature in the Lord we start to understand that we are born to be mild, not wild. I know some, even from the Christian community, will immediately take issue with that thought. So, let me elaborate. Jesus stated it clearly, “The meek (mild) shall inherit the earth.”.  My bet is that when you hear that someone is meek you first think they might be passive, timid with no strong convictions. Not true at all. The people Jesus was talking about are not wimpy at all. Much to the contrary. Why would Jesus hand over the authority to something as important as His kingdom to some spineless bunch of wimps? Well, He wouldn’t think of it.

Someone who is ‘meek’, or …mild, from that perspective is someone who doesn’t force his own will by manipulation, coercion or bullying. Nope. The mild person is the one who patiently waits for the Lord to move in every situation. As hard as it is at times the mild person is one that leans on the wisdom of the Holy Spirit to open and close doors. This is the kind of person the Lord can entrust with the riches of His kingdom. One who won’t take the credit for what only the Father should be given credit for.

Don’t make the dumb mistake of thinking that being ‘mild’ is dull or boring! It’s this bunch that will see the full manifestation of the power and glory of God! There’s not a more exciting life to be found anywhere! Only those who live by faith will experience it.

There’s a great adventure waiting for you! You were created for this!

You were born to be Mild!

So, “Get your motor runnin’, head out on the highway, look for some adventure, …..and whatever comes your way!”

*(I changed up the words a little! Maybe it’ll get stuck in your head!)

Get your motor runnin’
Head out on the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space
I like smoke and lightning
I like signs and wonders
Racin’ with the wind
And the feelin’ that I’m under
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space
Like a true kingdom child
We were born, born to be mild
We can climb so high
You’ll never have to die
Born to be mild
Born to be mild
Get your motor runnin’
Head out on the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space

Like a true kingdom child
We were born, born to be mild
We can climb so high
You’ll never have to die
Born to be mild
Born to be mild

Songwriter: Mars Bonfire

 

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Don’t Let the Old Man In Pt II

You can read Pt 1 here.  Whatever you do, go to Pt 1 and click the link on the song if you haven’t already done it. I promise You’ll like it.

Totally different perspective today. And, ……a little disclaimer up front especially for those wives out there whose hubby keeps coming home late after a drinkin’ binge, and in a bad mood! This is not gonna be about that! Sorry. ……maybe next time.

The Bible uses the terminology, ‘old man’ and ‘new man’ on several occasions. It’s an interesting analogy. The ‘old man’ refers to the old us. You know, the BC (Before Christ) version of us, and how we thought and behaved in our old life as hopeless, habitual sinners. That ‘old man’ was hard to leave behind. He didn’t go away without a fight and he still tries to come back every chance he gets. The Bible says that our ‘old man’ was crucified with Christ. To sum it up Jesus took on Himself all our sins and shortcomings and received the recompense for all our wrongdoings. In essence, on the cross He endured and received everything we had coming……and in turn, we received everything He had coming! Now, people, THAT is some kind of trade-off!!

So, in the future, as you’re being conformed into the image of Jesus you’re guaranteed to run into all kinds of challenges. You’re gonna get tested to the core! Your patience is gonna seem like it’s running plumb out. You’ll be tempted to go back to your old ways. In fact, there’ll be plenty of times it seems like the right thing to do.

But, you gotta get your focus back on! Get your priorities realigned again.

And, whatever you do, ………don’t let the old man in!

Col 3:9-10 – “Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old man with his deeds, and have put on the new man who is renewed”

Eph 4:24 – “…..put on the new man which was created according to God, in true righteousness and holiness.”

 

 

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“Show-and-Tell”

Show-and-tell is a common expression about showing an audience something and telling them about it. It’s usually initiated as a classroom activity at early elementary school used to teach young children the skills of public speaking. For example, a child will bring an item from home and will explain to the class why they chose that particular item, where they got it, and other relevant information.

I think show and tell is an amazing exercise for young people in a lot of ways. For one it breaks down the stigma and at least some of the fear of getting up in front of a group; a fear that, incidentally, most adults continue to struggle with their entire lives. But, I think I’d also be a huge proponent of the show-and-tell method for the Christian community. Just think about all the things that would be better understood by the rest of the world if we would do more than just ‘tell’ them, and actually show ’em.

We talk a lot about faith but the message loses it’s momentum if we never actually ‘walk’ by faith. And, grace, there’s another subject that’s getting a lot of attention these days. But, when we talk it and don’t treat other people with grace it, somehow, contaminates the message. But, I’d say the most important subject that we should apply the show-and-tell method is with love. Yep, that’s a word we use a lot around the church, and I agree, we should! But, I’m not sure we should use it at all if we’re not going to back it up with our attitude and actions.

This is where I think the show-and-tell method should really be working at it’s very best. And, if you think about it, we in the church should be the example to the rest of the world in this. By all means, let’s use the word, and let’s be genuine with it when we do! People really do have a need to hear that they’re loved.

And, if you find yourself in a time crunch and don’t feel like you can do both, show, and tell, …….just do the ‘show’ part. Chances are they’ll remember that forever!

 

 

 

 

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“Unrestricted Access”

You see the passes at most every public event, especially the big ones; “All Access”. The placard, usually worn around a person’s neck is an indicator for every official on the grounds of the event that anyone wearing this placard can go anywhere they want to go, and….at any time. Those “All Access” passes also carry the often unsaid understanding that the wearers are obviously of some importance. You know, like a real VIP!

The person wearing that “All Access” pass must’ve evidently been given a level of trust not offered to everyone. With that particular pass comes some extra responsibility, too, I’d say. Take a rock concert, for example. Let’s say Bob Seger (one of my faves, especially since I can’t go see Tom Petty anymore) is performing at Red Rocks. Now, that’d be a great combo; great entertainment at a great venue. If you have one of those “All Access” passes you might get to be up close and personal with Bob Seger, himself. I’ll bet you could even get your picture taken with him and the band if you were really lucky. But, without that “All Access” pass, …..it ain’t gonna happen! But, most of us are resigned to just go to the concert and enjoy the entertainment from a distance. Nothing wrong with that, whatsoever. But, it’s just not the same as having the VIP treatment.

The One Who created the Universe has given you an “All Access” pass to be in His presence anytime it strikes your fancy! There’s never a bouncer at the door, no one checking ID’s, nobody deciding if you have the correct credentials, not anyone there to turn you away because you don’t have the right clearance, nobody to stamp your hand in case you go out and want to come back in. You don’t even have to show your “All Access” pass! They ‘all’ know who you are! Nope, nothing, whatsoever, to keep you from engaging in conversation, face to face worship, fellowship, and communion with God, Himself! Think about that for a minute!

It’s true! You’ve been given (because we couldn’t earn it!) unrestricted access to God! That’s a BIG DEAL!

Question is, what are you gonna do about it??!”

 

Check it out:

Are You ‘Led’, or Are You ‘Driven’?

 

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“Let’s Do Something Crazy”

I have some pretty incredible grandkids, nine of them as of now. (the number will be 10 in a few weeks!) They’re all amazingly unique in their own ways. I had no idea, going in, that being a grandparent would have so many blessings attached to it. It has been a source of great joy for Julie and me for, now going on 19 years. I was talking to a friend about how much we enjoyed grandparenting and he gave the usual reply, “Yeah, you can spoil your grandkids and send ’em home”. I said, “Not us; we spoil ’em and keep ’em there”! Pretty much sums it up. We’re extremely blessed in that of the 9 grandkids we have, all but one little girl (2 hrs away), lives within five miles of us!

Our newest grandchild is Timber. She’s something! She’s about to turn 3 and like all the rest she’s been an unbelievable blessing. Clay and Chelsea are great as first-time parents. A few days ago they were at our house and Timber was playing around and just doing her thing. She ran from the kitchen into the living room full of excitement and said to Clay, “Dad, let’s do something crazy!” Without hesitation, Clay jumped up, grabbed Timber and threw her into the air….her little head nearly touching the ceiling. She cackled and said, “Let’s do it again!” And they did; but, this time he threw her up and spun her around in a 360* and caught her again at the same time. “Do it again, Dad!” This time he grabbed her by her little legs, held her upside down and flipped her up in the air and, just like clockwork, caught her again. She was laughing almost uncontrollably throughout the whole process. I guess it would’ve gone on all evening if Dad hadn’t given out.

Little kids have an incredible level of trust in their parents. We love to stand them up on the table and then tell them to ‘jump’ to us. They’ll do it every time! Why? ……’cause they trust us. They know we’d never let them fall. Wouldn’t it be something if we had that level and depth of trust with our Father!? I think it’s something we should shoot for!

Can’t you imagine how excited God might be if you woke up tomorrow and said to Him, “Let’s do something crazy!!”

 

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Don’t Bring Me Down

The Electric Light OrchestraELOis an English rock band formed in 1970 by songwriter/multi-instrumentalist Jeff Lynne. Their music was characterized by the use of instruments not commonly associated with rock music such as violins, cellos, oboes, clarinets, French horns and bassoons. Thus the ‘orchestra’ designation in their name. With the use of those instruments, you can accurately surmise that they had a very unique, but appealing sound. The band had a number of very popular songs. Interestingly enough, my favorite ELO song, “Don’t Bring Me Down”, (click on link for video) recorded in 1979 was their very first song not to include a string section. It was ELO’s highest charting song in the US, peaking at #3.

As an avid music lover, I’ve found that just about every song has a title, line, phrase or sometimes even just one word that, with a little imagination, can reveal some content that makes for some good spiritual conversation. This song is such a one. “Don’t Bring Me Down”. We have incredible potential with our attitudes and words spoken to those around us to do one of two things….lift them up, or…..bring them down. Looking back over my life I remember those who had a kind, encouraging, uplifting word for me. Those kinds of folks will do more for ya than you can imagine. Encouraging words lift us to another place. They help us believe in ourselves. I mean, if someone else believes in me then I must be OK, right?! Uplifting words have a healing effect on the human psyche. You’ll find yourself gravitating to those who have a kind word for you. And, it’s exactly the opposite for that other bunch that doesn’t have any good thing to say about anyone. Chances are that person was surrounded by parents, friends or peers who couldn’t say anything positive to them. And, it has become the norm; it’s contagious. I read recently that it takes 40 positive, affirming words to counter just one negative, condemning or cruel critical comment toward someone.

I may miss the mark. I may not always say the right thing. I may not handle every single situation perfectly. I might even do something that is just plain dumb. But, say something that lifts me up. Give me some encouragement! Speak life into me! Tell me something that’ll help me.

But, ……don’t bring me down!

Try these:

“Critics, There’s One on Every Corner”

“Sticks and Stones”

 

 

 

 

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