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Category Archives: Relationships

There’s a Better Way to Do It Than Cold Calls & Contracts

You know what I’m talkin’ about but let me clarify;

Cold Call – Unsolicited calls on (someone), by telephone or in person, in an attempt to sell goods or services.

Contract – Contract killing is a form of murder in which one party hires another party (often called a hitman) to kill a target individual or group of people.

Now, for starters, ….I ain’t specifically talking about either of those topics in the strictest sense. But those are the things that come to mind when I get asked by someone to go and talk to their friend or family member about the Lord. That’s what I call, putting out a contract on ’em. Their friend may be going through a rough patch in their life or they may be having problems that really do need the input of someone representing the Lord. The folks asking are nearly always well-meaning and clean hearted about it but I start to put on the brakes when I feel the conversation moving that way. It really makes me uncomfortable, especially if I don’t know the person having troubles, and I think it’s the Holy Spirit that makes me feel that way.

In all fairness, because I do what I do, people somewhat inaccurately believe that I should do this any time I’m requested to. I did it a few times back in the day before I learned better….and I’d have to say that my win/loss record was way less than impressive if you know what I mean! If you stop and think about it, it’s disrespectful to that person to ask someone to talk to them if they don’t know about it! Put your own self in their shoes. Nobody likes being ‘blindsided’! People just don’t like that! On the other hand, there are those out there who have been put under condemnation by their church or church friends telling them they need to get out there and tell everyone they know about Jesus, a method that I’m wholeheartedly against. Those guys will still probably do it for ya.

Here’s what changes everything. If your friend has given you permission to ask someone to visit with them then it’s OK. In fact, I’ll be one of the first ones to show up and help. Or, and this is a big one, if you ask me and I believe the Holy Spirit has directed me to do it (He does those kinds of things!) then, by all means, I’m going to! The Father will take care of the rest! But the best case scenario is that YOU talk to your friend about the Lord. You can tell real quick if he’s open to it or not. If not, don’t get pushy! Sometimes it’s just a matter of timing. If he knows you can be trusted he’ll likely ask you about it later.

If you’ve put a contract out on someone before don’t get all twisted up about it. You cared about your friend and that’s a good thing but learn from the situation, keep caring about people and move on.

But, if you plan on putting a contract out on someone and don’t have your friend’s permission and he’s not expecting it, ……..I’m probably not your guy!

 

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Born to be Mild

Not a misprint! You were expecting “Born to Be Wild”, right? I still hear that term every now and then. Anyone growing up in the 60s would be familiar with the phrase, remembering the hit song from John Kay, and Steppenwolf. Most people associate the song with the hit movie of the time, Easy Rider. Born to be Wild is sometimes regarded as the first ‘heavy metal’ song.

As we mature in the Lord we start to understand that we are born to be mild, not wild. I know some, even from the Christian community, will immediately take issue with that thought. So, let me elaborate. Jesus stated it clearly, “The meek (mild) shall inherit the earth.”.  My bet is that when you hear that someone is meek you first think they might be passive, timid with no strong convictions. Not true at all. The people Jesus was talking about are not wimpy at all. Much to the contrary. Why would Jesus hand over the authority to something as important as His kingdom to some spineless bunch of wimps? Well, He wouldn’t think of it.

Someone who is ‘meek’, or …mild, from that perspective is someone who doesn’t force his own will by manipulation, coercion or bullying. Nope. The mild person is the one who patiently waits for the Lord to move in every situation. As hard as it is at times the mild person is one that leans on the wisdom of the Holy Spirit to open and close doors. This is the kind of person the Lord can entrust with the riches of His kingdom. One who won’t take the credit for what only the Father should be given credit for.

Don’t make the dumb mistake of thinking that being ‘mild’ is dull or boring! It’s this bunch that will see the full manifestation of the power and glory of God! There’s not a more exciting life to be found anywhere! Only those who live by faith will experience it.

There’s a great adventure waiting for you! You were created for this!

You were born to be Mild!

So, “Get your motor runnin’, head out on the highway, look for some adventure, …..and whatever comes your way!”

*(I changed up the words a little! Maybe it’ll get stuck in your head!)

Get your motor runnin’
Head out on the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space
I like smoke and lightning
I like signs and wonders
Racin’ with the wind
And the feelin’ that I’m under
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space
Like a true kingdom child
We were born, born to be mild
We can climb so high
You’ll never have to die
Born to be mild
Born to be mild
Get your motor runnin’
Head out on the highway
Lookin’ for adventure
And whatever comes our way
Yeah Jesus go make it happen
Take the world in a love embrace
Fill all of your sons at once
And explode into space

Like a true kingdom child
We were born, born to be mild
We can climb so high
You’ll never have to die
Born to be mild
Born to be mild

Songwriter: Mars Bonfire

 

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The Mountains are Talkin’!

….and you’ve heard them too, whether you realize it or not! And, there’s a great possibility that you’ve been listening way too much at what they’re saying! I bet you’re wondering just what I’m talking about. Well, Jesus knew we’d be facing mountains in the natural course of our life so He addressed it up front for us. “Whosoever shall say to the mountain, be removed and cast into the sea, and doesn’t doubt in his heart that those things he says, he shall have whatsoever he shall say.” 

Now, realistically I can’t imagine why I’d ever want to move an actual mountain from one place to another. As far as I’m concerned they’re all exactly where they’re supposed to be. On second thought I wouldn’t mind having a couple of small ones out here in Western Oklahoma just to look at now and then, …..but it is what it is. One would then have to surmise that maybe Jesus wasn’t talking about a literal mountain at all but about the problems, obstacles and potential dangers we all face in life.

I’d be surprised if anyone reading this little piece didn’t have at least some obstacle facing them right now. It just seems to work out that way. Mountains talk a lot! And when you have one, the mountain will be in your face talkin’ smack from the time you wake up ’til you go to sleep at night. ……sometimes even in your sleep! “You ain’t gonna make it!”. “You’ve got cancer!”. “He doesn’t love you anymore!”. “Your friends are talking about you!”. “You’re a failure!”. “You don’t do enough good stuff for the Lord to love you!”. And, the list goes on and on. Mountains are relentless! They don’t let up! The more you listen, the more they talk!

I know you learned when you were a little kid to not ‘talk back’. Talkin’ back would get you in big trouble in those days. That was good advice then. But now, well now things have changed. You gotta start talkin’ back! I’ve found that the most effective way to talk back to mountains is to find me some scriptural promise that directly affects the lies the mountain is saying to me. Every time that mountain tells me I ain’t gonna make it, ……I’ll declare the Word of the Lord out loud to my mountain. You can bet your boots I’m gonna talk back! And, I’m gonna do it like I mean it even if it feels like I’m spittin’ in the wind.

That’s exactly what Jesus did when He was tempted by the devil in the wilderness. Those three times he appealed to logic in trying to deceive Jesus, each time Jesus answered with, “It is written…”. Worked then for Him, ……..and it’ll work now for you if you’ll just do it!

The payoff, …..you’ll find that your level of faith rises every time you declare the Word to your mountain. Your mountain will begin to diminish in size. It’s all about perspective. Your faith is being tested and your faith will grow as a result.

So, yeah the mountains are talking. Question is, “What are you saying to your mountain!?”

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Everybody Needs a “Hi-Pockets” Duncan in Their Life

I bet you never even heard of him! Well, that name meant nothing to me either until a few months ago. *(Thanks to my good friend, Charles Lynn who sent me an autographed copy of Terry Jennings [Waylon’s son!], and who I recently became friends with) brand new book, Waylon, Tales of My Outlaw Dad) Hi-Pockets was a Lubbock, Texas disc jockey in the ’50s who was instrumental in giving a young Lubbock performer, Charles Hardin Holly, better known as ‘Buddy’, his first real opportunity. In those days there was lots of talent around Lubbock but Buddy Holly was special.

You know the tragic story of Buddy Holly but you might not know that his young friend and bass player from nearby Littlefield, Texas gave his seat up to another performer on that ill-fated plane destined for Fargo, ND. Yep, Waylon Jennings, himself, should’ve been on that plane. The regular tour bus froze up and Buddy decided to charter a plane for himself and his band. The others would use a school bus for the long, cold drive to Fargo.

Waylon and Buddy were tight friends and before Buddy departed on that fateful night they jokingly exchanged barbs with one another. Since Waylon was going to have to ride a bus to the destination, Buddy jokingly said, “I hope the bus breaks down.” to which Waylon replied, “I hope your ‘ol plane crashes.”That would be a statement that would haunt Waylon for decades. In fact, it almost ruined him, and understandably so. It crippled him so emotionally that he basically quit the music business altogether.

It was months later and Waylon had no intentions of re-engaging in the music business at any level when Hi-Pockets cornered him that afternoon. I guess you could say he, more or less, gave him a good chewing out; you know, one of them old fashioned talkin’ to’s! He told him he had absolutely no business feeling guilty about his friend’s terrible twist of fate; and that what he should do is get out of the ditch he was in, quit moping around, get back up….and get going again. It took a few days for that advice to kick in, ……but it did! And the rest, as they say, is history.

There’s probably not a single one of us who’ve not had our dreams snuffed out. For some it’s been terminal; for others maybe just a delay in where their life was to go. But at any rate getting back up after a derailment is exactly what needs to happen. Someone said, “To be successful in life all you have to do is get back up one more time than you get knocked down”. Sounds easy,…..the actual ‘doing of it’ is much harder. But, undeniably, it IS the thing to do.

And, sometimes, it takes a Hi-Pockets Duncan type to get you up and going again. Better yet, …..maybe sometime you’ll have the chance to be that person of encouragement for someone else. Sometimes a good ‘talkin’-to’ is just the thing to get the ball rolling again!

 

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“Let’s Do Something Crazy”

I have some pretty incredible grandkids, nine of them as of now. (the number will be 10 in a few weeks!) They’re all amazingly unique in their own ways. I had no idea, going in, that being a grandparent would have so many blessings attached to it. It has been a source of great joy for Julie and me for, now going on 19 years. I was talking to a friend about how much we enjoyed grandparenting and he gave the usual reply, “Yeah, you can spoil your grandkids and send ’em home”. I said, “Not us; we spoil ’em and keep ’em there”! Pretty much sums it up. We’re extremely blessed in that of the 9 grandkids we have, all but one little girl (2 hrs away), lives within five miles of us!

Our newest grandchild is Timber. She’s something! She’s about to turn 3 and like all the rest she’s been an unbelievable blessing. Clay and Chelsea are great as first-time parents. A few days ago they were at our house and Timber was playing around and just doing her thing. She ran from the kitchen into the living room full of excitement and said to Clay, “Dad, let’s do something crazy!” Without hesitation, Clay jumped up, grabbed Timber and threw her into the air….her little head nearly touching the ceiling. She cackled and said, “Let’s do it again!” And they did; but, this time he threw her up and spun her around in a 360* and caught her again at the same time. “Do it again, Dad!” This time he grabbed her by her little legs, held her upside down and flipped her up in the air and, just like clockwork, caught her again. She was laughing almost uncontrollably throughout the whole process. I guess it would’ve gone on all evening if Dad hadn’t given out.

Little kids have an incredible level of trust in their parents. We love to stand them up on the table and then tell them to ‘jump’ to us. They’ll do it every time! Why? ……’cause they trust us. They know we’d never let them fall. Wouldn’t it be something if we had that level and depth of trust with our Father!? I think it’s something we should shoot for!

Can’t you imagine how excited God might be if you woke up tomorrow and said to Him, “Let’s do something crazy!!”

 

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Of All the Ways He Blesses Us

If you start to count up all the ways that God blesses you, you’ll quickly find that the list is almost endless! He’s not limited in the ways He blesses and He seems to stop at nothing in His mission to show us just how much he loves us. Even some of His most hardened critics, if they were to be totally honest,  would have to admit that He does this kind of thing on a routine basis. He doesn’t just love us because He has to; He doesn’t just love us because it’s the ‘right’ thing to do; He doesn’t just love us because we need it; All that may be true but that’s not why He does it. No…..He loves us like we love our own kids (and grandkids!)…….He just can’t help it!

His interaction with us is always motivated by love. Even in those times when we are receiving correction from Him, it’s always in love. The Father doesn’t just ‘have’ love, …..He IS love! And every single thing He does, or has ever done, is for our benefit and well being.  I’m grateful for good health. I’ve rarely been sick in my entire life. Oh, I’ve got plenty of aches and pains from some of my previous lifestyle choices but all in all, I’ve been really blessed with good health. There’s dozens of other things I could mention.

But, when I think of all the ways He’s blessed me my mind immediately goes to my family then my friends and the people who I’ve met, and gotten to know, along the way. So, of all the ways He’s blessed me one of the things I’m the most grateful of is by the people He’s brought into my life. At the end of our earthly run we’ll see it clearer than ever. The things that have made our lives rich are not fame and fortune or some other empty thing like that, but the people we’ve encountered, day-in and day-out, on the journey of life. So, I’m suggesting we make the mental adjustment now…..and put a premium value on our relationships so we can enjoy our lives to the fullest….starting today!

Thank you, Lord, for the people you’ve brought across my path!!

 

 

 

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“You Didn’t Put a Mojo on Me, Did Ya’?!”

Years ago after we’d moved to Oklahoma and started the church I had a lifelong friend call me late one night. My friend was a brawler, didn’t mind a good fight and had been known to conspire one up if it didn’t happen naturally. I doubt he’d ever been to church anywhere before. No criticism about that but, understandably, he just didn’t have much spiritual orientation at all. I could tell he was really bothered about something but he wouldn’t say, just what, over the phone. It was past 11 pm and he said he really needed to talk to me. So, no big deal, pulled some clothes on and headed on over to his house. He had all kinds of questions for me about the Lord. Some I could answer, some I couldn’t. He was very sincere. After a couple of hours we were winding up our visit and the subject of salvation came up. I’m not a pressure guy by anyone’s standards. Jesus didn’t do it….so I ain’t gonna do it either! But, I was quick to thoroughly explain the Biblical plan of salvation to my friend when he asked. At the end of our conversation I asked him, “Well, do you want to be born again?”. He was really struggling for an answer and it took him thirty seconds or more to say, “Well, I know I should but I just don’t think right now’s the time”. “You know I just bought this bar, and all, and I just don’t think the timing’s right”. I said, “OK, no problemo. Let me know if you ever want to talk about it.” He agreed and I asked him if I could pray for him. After I prayed we said our goodbyes and I went home.

About two weeks later my friend called again, this time past midnight. He started out, “You know, I bought this bar. I’m making more money than I’ve ever made in my life…..but something just ain’t right.” “I don’t know what it is but I just keep thinking about the Lord, …..and that ain’t like me at all.” I said, “Well, you know He does love you, and He’s just probably trying to prove it to you.” Then……..he finally got down to the real reason he called me. He said, “You know the other night when you prayed for me?” I said, “Yeah”. He said, “You didn’t put some kinda mojo on me did ya’??!” He was serious as a heart attack! I just busted up laughing. I said, “Son, the Lord’s got a mojo on you!” I explained to him that it’s just how the Lord works. My friend eventually gave his life to the Lord, sold the bar and is walking with the Lord today. 

When I tell that story today I still laugh! But the truth of the matter is that, whoever you are…and wherever you are spiritually, the Lord does have a mojo on you! Not the kind you’d normally think about though. Certainly not a demonic spell or anything in the neighborhood of that. But, He’s out to get ‘ya, alright. ……and just like I told my friend, “He just wants to prove to you how much He loves you!”

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I’ve Never ‘Led’ Anyone to the Lord, and I Ain’t Planning on Doing it Anytime Soon!

Have a Nice Day, Lord!

You Can Only Do What You Can Only Do!

 

 

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